I'm afraid of my cereus!!

Does anybody but Jim and I remember "Little Shop of Horrors"? I'm beginning to think I have discovered the plant species of the Audrey 2. It has to be a night-blooming cereus! I brought my cereus inside back in October (or september or whenever it was, You people look it up in the past postings if you're so worried about it) and before I brought it it, I trimmed the thing back fairly heavy. Then we stuck it back in the darkest corner we have in the house and about half the time forget to water it. Then the other night I noticed that it was erupting with new foliage (well, not foliage like most plants, it throws out these modified stems that later widen into something that looks sorta like a leaf) there's about nine of them so far, one about halfway up to the ceiling and another reaching for the middle of the room. And we all remember what Audrey 2 ate, don't we?

I'm not saying that I have heard it talking to me. I have heard it, but I wouldn't say that in a blog where people might decide I'm crazy. Most of the people that know me already know I'm nuts, heck they don't even have to know me for very long to start to suspect. Actually, I like the line last night from "Boston Legal". (Don't blame me, Kathy got me hooked on it) When asked if he kept in touch with his imaginary friends from childhood, he replied "Sometimes we have reunions." I can relate. My problem is that the voices in my head never heard of parlimentary procedure.

Sorry it has taken me so long to update this thing. School is crazier than I thought. Don't you just love that every professor thinks that their subject is the most important in the world and it doesn't matter if you skip the homework in your other classes because those professors will understand.... Sure they will. anyway, I've been studying and typing through most of my free time. Actually, I should be doing my lab prep for chemistry tonight. I'm working on the theory that it won't take me very long. In my defense, I did kinda skim it before I sat down to do this and it didn't look to complicated.

Well, I guess I messed around too long. Blogger started me on their new one against my will. It wouldn't let me sign on to the old blogger. When I tried it kicked me over to opening a new one. I still haven't heard whether there are any problems. I guess when Susan yells at me again for taking too long I'll know.

For those 0f you that have been paying attention to these rants for a while you know that I'm hooked on the old standards music. Unfortunately, I don't really know anybody else that likes it so I'm having to grope my way. But I have found another great. Billy Eckstine, or the Great Mr. B, sung in the '30s and '40s, and he has the smoothest baritone voice you'll ever hear! It is amazing. When I first started listening, it was mostly Frank, and he's still pretty good. But there are people out there that just blew Ol' Blue Eyes away!

Ok, I'm going to do my chem lab prep. I'll try to bee a little better at this (sure, you've promised that before [shut up, they understand] yeah, they understand that you're slow and lazy[ that does it. I'm not letting you go to class tonight] poor me. chem how exciting. you don't even get to blow stuff up anymore!)

Ok, that's it. I sent him to the corner. I'll do more another time. God bless. Wayne

Winter Wonderland

Isn't the snow beautiful in Uptown OKC? Well. Not exactly, because it isn't really snow. It's all just sleet. Someday we may get some snow, but not in this bout.










We have been poured on by the "Great Ice Storm of '07". At least that's what all the TV stations have been calling it. I promise they have been in hog heaven. Actually, I think it just proves that God has a sense of humor. It is all so pretty but it makes a rotten snowman.

Well, I realized that I still haven't posted the gardening chores for January. I blame the Christmas season, when it lasts longer than the carols in the department stores, it tends to take everything else out of your mind. So here it is:


January
If precipitation has been deficient (1" of snow = ~ 1/10" of
water), water lawns, trees, and shrubs, especially
broadleaf and narrowleaf evergreens. Double check
moisture in protected or raised planters.
Check on supplies of pesticides. Secure a copy of current
recommendations and post them in a convenient place.
Dilution and quantity tables are also useful.
If you did not treat young pines for tip borers in November,
do so before March.
Check that gardening tools and equipment are in good
repair, sharpen, paint, and repair mowers, edgers, sprayers,
and dusters.
Inspect your irrigation system and replace worn or broken
parts.
Control overwintering insects on deciduous trees or shrubs
with dormant oil sprays applied when the temperature is
above 40o F in late fall and winter. Do not use dormant
oils on evergreens.
A product containing glyphosate plus a postemergent
broadleaf herbicide can be used on dormant bermuda in
January or February when temperatures are above 50o F
for winter weed control.

You'll notice that most of the things have to do with pesticides. My apologies to my "green" friends, but there are people out there that use the stuff and if they're going to use it at least I want them to use it right. Remember, with pesticides of all kinds, less is more and just because a tablespoon works doesn't mean two tablespoons will work better! Actually, I would be more than happy if the whole world went to Integrated Pest Management, but I don't really see that happening. I did a report a few years back and according to the EPA the use of pesticide and fertilizer on residencial areas is about 50 times that of agricultural. Now come on people. Your yard is stopping world hunger, its just feeding the grasshoppers. And there isn't any bug killer out there that will kill a grasshopper after it's second shed.

Anyway, not to be a complete downer. Here is ..... TaTaTaTaTaDaaaaaa... What's in bloom. Yes, I know it's January, yes I know that there is several inches of ice on the ground (actually I took this picture before the ice, but the flowers are still on there, they aren't happy, but they're there.
This is the flower of the winter jasmine. It is deciduous, although as you can see, the stems are a dark green that fools the eye from a distance. On warm humid days (not a whole lot of those in January) you can smell it's true jasmine fragrance from quite a distance. Plus it is blooming in January, not too shabby. There is one at Myriad gardens that is about six or seven feet tall and wide, arching over and covered in blooms, well, it was before the ice. Now, who knows.

And for those of you who thought I was crazy for babying along a red twig dogwood through the Oklahoma summer.
This is our dogwood against the ice. Of course, we only have a few days a year that we have this kind of background for it. And you can't see it from the inside because we have insulating plastic on the windows. And you can't enjoy it from the outside because it is bloody cold out there. Ok, so maybe I am crazy. I still think it is pretty.

Well, that about does it for me. Kathy wants to go to Mustang and see Maddox. So I guess I'm going to go clean the car off so I can see to drive.

Stay warm, stay happy stay loved. Wayne

The ice storm is coming, the ice storm is coming!!!!

Well, ain't life a pip? After salivating for days the meteorologists are finally getting the ice they have been praying for. Sleet has been coming down here in Oklahoma City for about three hours now and the roads are getting iffy. I went and picked Kathy up early, took my mom some groceries so she won't starve and hit Blockbuster for a couple of movies. And yes as a matter of fact, I did pick up "Johnny Dangerously", it is, after all, the best Michael Keaton movie ever made. Kathy has never seen it and since we are stranded at the house until the spring thaw (which I figure will happen Sunday or Monday, but it may be tomorrow) I'm going to make her watch it with me. "Ya shouldn't oughta hang me on a hook, Johnny. My dad hung me on a hook once....Once!" That's for Jim. Even if nobody else gets it, I know he will.

Have you ever noticed how wives can get you on trouble very easily? I have been in the application process at OSU Stillwater for a couple of weeks. Since classes didn't start til the 22nd, I figured I had plenty of time to get everything straightened out. Well, classes start the 22nd at OSU/OKC anyway. In Stillwater they started the eighth. Needless to say, I didn't leave myself enough time. So Kathy says, "Go over to Rose State and look into taking that chem class you need to graduate from OSU/OKC and at least maybe you'll get a couple of credits in this semester." So over to Rose I go and ask the lady in the prospective students office for a catalog and schedule and she asked if I had applied and I said no and she suggested that I apply and enroll that day so I could get the classes I wanted and so I did and so now I am a student at Rose State. Well, it was necessary, I guess. That is the only school in OKC that I have not gone to. I got Kathy back, tho. I'm also taking Financial and Managerial Accounting (no, I don't know why that is a required course for Public Horticulture) and guess who my tutor is going to be! Ha! That'll fix her!

Well, my son-in-law, D'Artagnon asked for the link to this thing and I sent it to him. I probably should go through my old posts and see if I've said anything bad about him and delete it..... Naw, usually the meanest thing I say about him is making fun of his name and I do that to his face. He's the one I like. I don't really get along with my family all that well. We are avoiders. If it seems like it is going to be a problem, we avoid it until it is easier to just not go around each other rather than fix the problem. Yeah, like I've said before, we put the dis in dysfunctional.

This is D'Art. I'm trying to get him to let me take a serious picture of him and he always wants to make a goofy face, (no he isn't just goofy, well, yeah, he kinda is) so now that he is going to read this thing I'm going to post all the silly pictures of him until he'll let me get a good one.


Nothing else is really happening, so I'll close this out. All of you, find one person that really needs to be loved and do something nice for them. it will amaze you how good it will make them and you feel. Unless they are paranoid, at which point they'll start going crazy about what you're really up to. And let's face it, that's fun too.

God bless. Wayne

Christmas is over at last!

Well, last night we went out with our son Jonathan and his wife Audrey and their three kids, Sabastian, Rebeka and Nadia. After dinner at Pizza Inn (well, we were paying and let's face it, that's a lot of kids) they came over and the kids opened their Christmas presents. Just in time to plan for Sabastian's birthday on January 10th.

The kids seem to like the presents. If you're wondering about having never heard of them before, we don't get to see them too often. Jon is the oldest of my kids and when his mom and I got divorced it hit him fairly hard. And let's face it, his mom doesn't have a lot of nice things to say about me. Jon at least is up front about things. He'll at least come out and tell you that he doesn't like me very much. My middle child (Alison) doesn't talk to me much and says she doesn't have a problem. My youngest child (Abby) didn't talk to me for a couple of years but says she never had a problem with me, but Alison and her mother did. Oh well, the kids like me, well, Bas and Beka does. Actually Nadia would scream any time I got near her, but last night she was crawling all over me. I have pictorial proof!

Here's Beka on top of me and Nadia climbing up in my lap. I think Beka was trying to break my neck here.













And here's Nadia giving her grandpa Wayne a hug. No I'm not really holding on to her to keep her from running away!













And here's Bas and the back of his dad's head. He is of course, too mature to climb all over his grandpa, being 12 years old on the tenth.








So Christmas is finally over. Kathy and I have gotten everything for everybody until next year. Maybe next year we can make Christmas last only a few weeks instead of a few months.

Well, Susan made a comment on my last post saying that she will sell my house and make me move. Hah, fat chance! I told you what it would take to make me move. Get me my house (you know which one) for about 20 grand and we'll talk. Why yes, the sky is a nice, rosy pink in my world.

I've been thinking lately. I have discovered the problem with the church. Usually I just pick on the Baptists cause I know them. I was raised a Baptist and have spent most of my life in the Baptist church. We Baptists have a lot of problems, but I think I have discovered one with the entire corporate church. We've given up the miracle business! We've given up prophecy. Prophecy in the Biblical definition, telling the truth. Let's leave the soothsayers out of it. But if any of them are willing to work under the Old Testament test for prophecy I would be perfectly willing to believe in them!

Maybe it isn't just the church. Maybe it is the world. Elijah listened when God spoke to him and he spread the word to others. Today he would be tossed in an insane asylum as soon as he opened his mouth, (let's not even contemplate the dung fire and lying on one side) we wouldn't want to listen to him (well, neither did Israel, but that's another problem). Anyway, Paul listened to Jesus and stopped persecuting the church. And the church forgave him! Would we have the same sense of forgiveness? Would we believe the miracle?

A few years ago, Kathy and I were going to a large church on the northwest side and one of the girls of college age wanted to do an experiment where people prayed for germs. Ok, it may be weird, but she set up this experiment because her professor was a non-believer and she wanted to give him a reason to believe. Well, the poor child had a heck of a time finding 20 people to put the germs on their prayer list. My favorite excuse was that God didn't care about germs. I think the problem was that we have stopped believing in miracles. "What if God doesn't answer our prayer?" By the way, he did. The germs in the petri dish that got prayed for; notice I said prayed for, not prayed over, as far as I know nobody that was praying for the germs (the girl removed herself so there couldn't be a conflict) ever even saw the petri dishes until the experiment was over; those germs grew more than 85 % faster. The professor still didn't believe. He said that the germs picked up vibes from her and knew she wanted them to grow faster. Well, my problem isn't with the professor. My problem is with the church. There were still people in the church that were unable to see that maybe God doesn't care about germs, but He cares enough about us that He'll even answer our stupid prayers. And yes, I don't think that was a particularly holy use of prayer time, but it proved to the girl that there were people who cared enough about her to pray for her experiment, and it proved to her and some others that God cares enough to listen.

Look for a miracle. Stop thinking that miracles are things of the past. Stop thinking that God doesn't do miracles anymore. And before you think I'm talking about things from TV or something remember that miracles may not be flashy or big. Jesus used mud that he made from his own spit. And would we be willing to accept that miracle? See the miracle in every butterfly. See the miracle in every smile from a child. See the miracle in the healing that God can do, go ahead and go to the doctor, but don't expect that to be the only medicine you need.

Look for the miracles that God has put into your life. And thank Him for them.

God bless you all.

Wayne

Happy New Year!

Yes, I know this is the second day of 2007. I'm surprised I got started on this post this soon. This place has been crazy. Twelve days of Christmas? Hah, we do 30 days of Christmas. We had Christmas the Saturday after Thanksgiving so Laura could give Keith his presents. Then we had Christmas the next weekend so we could give Laura and the kids their presents. Then we had Christmas on Christmas with Jill, Jeff and Maddox and Keith (he came back into town for Christmas) and then on last Sunday my mom had Christmas at her house (which we didn't go to because, let's face it, when my sister and I get together we put the DIS in disfunctional.) Anyway, since we weren't going to my mom's we had Abby and D'Art bring Natasha and Ethan over and if I can ever get my son to answer his phone we'll figure out a time to get the presents over to those kids. So a few pictures to let you know what Christmas was like.

Ryan thanking his Nana for his present (and Nana hiding that cheesy, fake grin he does for all pictures.)










Ethan on the communal Big Wheel.














Kathy and Natasha reading "The Giving Tree", one of Natasha's presents (yes I still tear up when I hear it).


















Maddox perfecting his slam dunk (you know, OSU has a much better basketball team than OU).










Well, that is just a little of Christmas. It took even longer than it took Blogger to download the photos.

Other stuff that Kathy and I have been doing. We went to Target the other day and Kathy couldn't figure out why everybody had cart loads of Christmas stuff and then the Starbucks lady told me that everything was 75% off, so we ended up with a cartload of Christmas stuff. Next year I'll have pictures of the matching 6 1/2 foot trees we got for the porch for 10 bucks each, with match ing tree skirts. And several miles of garland. I'm tired just thinking about it.

Speaking of thinking. Have you noticed how bizarre home ownership is? Kathy and I have a "vintage" home. According to Susan, that's a nice way to say old. Anyway, we have a dehumidifier in our cellar (yes, we have a cellar. And cellars in Oklahoma are always damp, so everybody gets dehumidifiers so they don't get mold and mildew on everything they put in the cellar. It would be easier not to use the cellar but then we only have four cubit feet of closet space in the whole house. Apparently, people in 1908 didn't have any clothes.) Ok, so we have a dehumidifier in our cellar. But because it is winter and we are running the heat we have to have a humidifier in our bedroom so our sinuses don't dry out and start to bleed. Why isn't there a way to bring all that humidity up from the cellar to the second floor? Anyway, besides the humidity problems, we need to renovate out shower. We have a corner set-in shower in the second upstairs bathroom and it is starting to leak. So now we need to get a new one. And since the people that owned our house before us renovated with the set-in it is easier to just replace it rather than building a new one (and with me and plumbing, easier is definitely important). But they don't make them that size anymore (which is a good thing because we don't really fit in the bloody thing anyway), so we have to get one that is about three inches bigger on each side. And I want to get the one that comes out a little bit and is rounded so I feel like I have at least a little elbow room and am not knocking the door open every time I bend down to wash my feet. Oh, well, we'll do what we do. If there is anybody out there with loads of plumbing and building experience that wants to come over and help me install the stupid thing for free I'll supply pizza and beer (well, a couple of slices and a six-pack).

Hope everyone is having a wonderful New Year and that it just gets better and better,

God bless, Wayne

I'm sorry I have been so inactive lately. I would try to blame it on Christmas, but mostly I've just been lazy. Once Laura and the kids left I just quit doing anything mostly, which makes for a really boring blog.

Well, to come up with an idea I'm stealing this idea from Susan who stole it from Kay's and Carolyn's blogs. Well, maybe not stole..... Yeah pretty much.

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate pretty much all year long. I usually drink it instead of coffee, unless I'm at Starbucks where I get a venti mocha. Wait, that's pretty much hot chocolate. During the Christmas season I love to drink egg nog. The problem is that if I buy some (I haven't made any for years) I'll drink the whole thing in one sitting, and since Kathy has decided that we need to lose weight I've tried to stay away from it this year.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just leave them under the tree? When I was growing up and when my kids were growing up anything wrapped was from a family member. Santa's presents were unwrapped. We did the same thing when my kids were small.

3. Colored or white lights on the tree? Colored, colored, colored!

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't.

5. When do you put your decorations up? Decorations are mostly Kathy's thing. So I put up whatever she can get me to help with whenever she can get me to help.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? Turkey and (Kathy's, only Kathy's) dressing. With plenty of turkey I don't really care what else there is.

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child. Sneaking down before everyone else was awake and looking at all the presents.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? My brother and sister blew the story when I was 8 or 9. I pretended to believe for a while because I'm no dummy, if you don't believe in Santa you don't get any presents.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? Nope, had to wait till Christmas morning and even then usually after church.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? However Kathy makes me decorate it.

11. Snow! Love it or leave it? Love it in pictures, hate it when I'm trying to get anywhere. I thought for years that I hated cold. One winter in St Louis I realized that I just hate wind.

12. Can you ice skate? I can fall on my butt.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? A Dick Tracy Junior Detective Set. It came with a badge, a wrist radio (that I never could get Dick Tracy to answer) and a gun that shot out little plastic bullets. Yeah, Mom got rid of the bullets fairly soon.

14. What is your favorite thing about the holidays? The thought that Jesus came to this world just for me!

15. What is your favorite holiday dessert? My absolute favorite is my mother's buttermilk chess pie, however I am the only person in the entire world that actually loves fruitcake.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? The new tradition (well, it's a few years old now) of watching my grandchildren rip open presents.

17. What do you prefer, giving or receiving? Receiving, but not big things. I like lots of little things that show that the person thought of me when they got them. I love giving the perfect gift but with the adults I know the perfect thing isn't usually perfect. Of course, with grandchildren, as long as it makes noise and flashes lights, it's perfect.

18. What tops your tree? A star that Kathy and I got a few years after we were married.

19. What is your favorite Christmas song? By the time Christmas comes I am usually so sick of Christmas songs because they've been playing them in Wal-Mart since St Patrick's Day. But during a candlelight service Silent Night can make me tear up and I love Eartha Kitt's Santa Baby, actually it stays on my mp3 all year.

20. Candy canes, yuck or yum? The fruit ones are pretty tasty, although they are a sin against nature. The peppermint ones should only be hung on the tree and look pretty.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful Christmas. Remember that Jesus came for us.

Just in case you need an extra Christmas present.

May God bless each of you.

Wayne

Baby, it's cold outside!

Ok, I'll admit it. I am a wimp when it comes to cold. Actually, I can stand the cold, it is the wind I absolutely hate. I think I'm living in the wrong place, considering that Oklahoma gets more wind on a daily basis than Chicago. The weathermen (those never erring prognosticators) said that the wind today would be light, 10 to 20 miles an hour. That doesn't seem all that light to me. But I guess since it is supposed to be blowing 15 to 35 miles an hour tomorrow I'll try to enjoy this.

Well, Susan and Jim and Susan's mom and dad, Berle and Roy came over for dinner the other night. I think everyone had a good time, I know I had a great time. Everyone ate and talked and had a good time. Susan ate everything on her plate and even ate some of these really nasty cookies that Laura gets in southeast Missouri. I swear that they are made out of library paste with little fake chocolate chips mixed in. Susan had to eat around the chips but she could at least eat the cookie. One more dessert wins against steroids! Kathy told me after Thanksgiving that it was rude to take pictures while people are eating so I didn't get any shots of people with their mouths full and after everybody was finished I was to full to get up and get the camera. Here is a pic that Ryan took with his mother's camera. I still don't get why it is rude for me to take pictures but cute for a 5-year-old to do it (although his mother isn't looking like she thinks it's all that cute). Just to prove to you that artistic talent runs in the family here are some other shots Ryan took.






Notice that his focus is the princess castle instead of his sister. This gives an aura of mystery to the entire shot.







This is my personal favorite. Notice the importance given to the baby wipes container. Notice that it takes on almost gigantic proportions. Notice the thumb in the corner. I told you he took after his Papi. Actually I have been teasing his mother since his birth about how much he looks like me. It used to make her crazy but she has started to accept it.
This one is a masterwork of color and surrealism. I think that might be a belly button but I don't know for sure.











Ok, enough of his masterpieces. After all, he may be an artistic genius but he and his sister are also cute as the dickens. Here is Erin posing with her gingerbread house that she made (with a little bit of help from her mother).

And here's Ryan with his. He had a little less help from his mother. I personally think they both did a wonderful job!

And one last pic. Erin is finally used to me enough that she won't scream and yell when I pick her up or help her do something. She'll even call me Papi and tell me about her Polly Pockets. And trust me, there is a lot of stuff to tell about Polly Pocket.

Take care of yourselves, and take care of someone you love today.

Wayne